M-Day Countdown Day 1: Dec 1

On the 28th day of December in this year of our Lord two thousand and twelve I will no longer be a single man in the eyes of man and God. That strangely is not so strange, I guess when I decided I decided. I did have a moment of panic, kind of, one day or night was it but it was minor and I havent had anything like that since. I'm actually ready, well not so ready but excited to be married. Actually being ready and having the feeling of excitement are two very different things. She's been gone for 2 weeks and I didn't feel the urge to go out and party. It's like that, I'm decided. But I honestly feel like I'd be a disaster to marry but too late, it's happening, and I guess it's one of those things you get better at as you go. Like most things. Like everything, right? I don't know one person who was born knowing how to wipe his own ass. Everything is learned. Anyhow like I said before I like to memorialize moments, especially ones that will never be again - like the last month I will ever be a legally single man. I need to do something everyday until M-day, document and post it here. Something my 57 year old self could look back on and laugh at or cry at, who knows in what state my 57 year old self would be. Today I did get to go to the gym, bc I now know the hours and I was showering after and I didn't care. I mean I remember I used to care, when I was a kid in L.A. on the swim team, all the black kids would walk around with their ds hanging out like nothing and I would go hide and change or wait til everybody was gone. High school I was embarrassed too, college same story and then today I realized, whatever, I take it as a sign of getting older. I digress. So everyday from today on for the next 28 days I will post something. A drawing or a video or something. My own advent calendar: The calendar windows open to reveal an image, poem, a portion of a story or a small gift, such as a toy or a chocolate item.

Day 1: